"Basnus"

       As mentioned before, I'm reminded more and more everyday just how different life is here from my life in America. Sometimes I see only subtle difference, other times I am taken back by vast oceans of cultural variation. Since my family doesn't want me walking around by myself much, I've taken to touring the neighborhood with my father. It's very enjoyable, but it's far from what I would call a "walk" in the US. In fact there is not much walking at all - it's quite impossible to make it very far on these Nepali walks.  As we walk down the road, maybe five minutes in we meet someone we know well - a relative or school teacher, and after we greet them we are immediately asked to sit. The greeter often stands up to give their own seat to me. The phrase
"basnus" which mean means please sit is an excellent way to describe Nepali culture in general I think. Though many Nepalis work harder than many Americans I know, the concept of resting is very important in Nepal - as is the politeness of offering one a seat. The phrase is said so often, to me and others, that you would think standing is a crime. These so called walks turn into two hours of touring around the neighborhood two minutes away from our home, sitting at five or six different locations and drinking tea at at least one of them.

      It's quite pleasant really, except when you are craving a real walk. I get very little exercise here, except for going up and down the stairs several times a day. I'm also just tired of sitting, but I even now feel weird when I am standing, mostly because I know it makes those around me uncomfortable. They treat each other so nice here - offering food, tea, and a seat without ever expecting a thank you - and they treat me, as their guest, even better. It's overwhelming, to be treated so well honestly. It's hard to accept that they won't let me wash the dishes, that I am always the first to be served food, and that I am provided special treatment when I could name one hundred other people that deserve it more.

      I have told my family, that seven months is a long time to be a guest, and some of the special treatment has lessened a bit thankfully... but in Nepali culture, they say that "a guest is god." It's a little hard to argue with that. I will be a welcomed guest here (especially because of my white skin, my English language, my American nationality) for a long time, and it has definitely become a learning experience for me in understanding my white privilege.  And it's also the struggle of balancing my culture (of not wanting bother anyone or cause any extra work) and theirs (always automatically giving and doing extra work for others). There is really no Nepali words for please and thank you... so I smile and use my American words, and they say "welcome."